This is an outcry of a woman who has been married for the past 12 years but has never experienced joy and happiness in her marriage. She feels so suffocated by her husband’s incessant womanizing and utter neglect of his marital duties and is presently having the nudge to kill him and end the tragic drama that is call marriage for her. She needs help and advice before she commits murder.
I am Mrs Stella Amadi, a civil servant and from the Eastern
part of the country. I am married with three children, all boys. I have been
married for the past 12years. But all through this twelve years of my marriage,
I have never known peace in my home. My husband is a drunk, a womanizer,
stupid, foolish and an idiot. He has neglected me and my children and spending
money on his numerous women.
Before we got married,
he was so nice and sweet, gives me all I asked for and even tells me that he
will always make me happy for marrying him. I didn’t want to anyway, if not for
my younger sister who convinced me. I did not know that behind those niceties,
expensive gifts and smiles lies a demon. I so much hate him with passion for
In spite of this realization, I have tried to put up with his
dirty and immoral attitudes. Though, he has not raised his hand against me
probably because I try to avoid confronting him or picking up quarrels with him.
I have prayed to marry a man like my father. Never for one
day have I seen him quarrel with my mother. But all my wish have come to
nothing. My parents are not even helping matters. They are always advising me
to endure and pray that God will help change my husband.
For twelve years I had endured prayed, fasted yet nothing good has happened rather my husband is getting worst by the day. It has gotten to the extent that he brings home his concubines and I will be forced to sleep in the guest room. I am concerned about my children who watch their father bring different women into our matrimonial home. They might be young but they sure know what is going on and it may affect them negatively.
As it stands now I really do not have enough words to qualify
the hatred I have for my husband for subjecting me to this emotional torture.
To be honest with you, I nearly put rat poison into his food so that he will
eat and die so that I can have
peace of mind. I was filled with
hatred and bitterness and for him at that moment and it took the grace and love
of God to restrain myself from killing my husband.
I have gotten it up my neck and I don’t know for how long I will be able to hold myself back. Please I need your advice as my emotion is taken the better part of me.
Marriage is not a bed of Roses. but we can make a rose out of the torns of marriage only if we try and stay and act positive. it might take a while, a long while for that matter. if married couples should realize that love conquers all and approach all marital problems with love, all trials and temptations that comes with the nuances of marital conflicts will one day be resolved.
I advise you purge your minds of all negative thoughts. Think of the beautiful children God had given you. think of the Life God had given you. Thanks to God that you have the financial capacity to take care of your children. Appreciate and thank God for his love and be happy. everything will fall in place very soon.
LOVE YOURSELF, LOVE YOUR HUSBAND EVEN THOUGH HE DOES NOT DESERVE IT. LOVE YOUR CHILDREN, LOVE AND APPRECIATE LIFE AS IT IS. BEHIND EVERY CLOUD THERE IS A SILVER LINING. LOOK OUT FOR THE SILVER LINING IN YOUR CLOUD. EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON. LEARN THE LESSONS IN YOUR EXPERIENCE TODAY TO MAKE A BETTER TOMORROW. ALL WILL BE WELL SOON.